My "Dirty Dozen" List; For What Makes A Woman Un-Attractive (vs Attractive).

For me personally?

1. Major Personality Disorder(s)

2. Combatative or "hard" personality. 

3. Christian-religious.
It's fine if she's only surface-level, casually, or culturally "Christian".
But if she takes it more seriously than that, it gets factored into "The Crazy/Hot Matrix".

[Disclaimer:

Please note, when he gets to the part where he disparages trans-identity, I cringe. I don't talk that way. I don't think it's respectful or decent to talk about trans people that way; regardless of how you or I might answer the question "What is a woman?". I don't date trans persons. But I don't talk disrespectfully about them either. I don't think it's ok to politically weaponize vulnerable people's psychosocial paradigm. But the rest of this is spot-on. I don't have the time (right now) to re-make this video without that part. So I'd ask you to understand this in context.]

4. Unhealed traumas caused by men.
I don't want to spend ANY amount of time paying the interest on a debt some other men owe her.
I refuse to be in that situation again.

5. Princess-mentality who "always comes first".

6. Has already "hit the wall", in her aging.
I'm really not superficial.
I don't really care about age, generally. Nor do I really care about weight. In fact, here are a couple of examples of women who are "chubby" that have strong face-appeal to me.

I'm not a "chubby chaser".
It's just not an issue for me. 

But at some point, all women's faces eventually look like a guy in a wig. #SorryNotSorry 
#BlameBiology 
So I need to fall in love *before* she "hits the wall", so that *after* she hits the wall I will still see her as beautiful.

I was in love once. Even if her face would have fallen off, I would have always loved her. That's how I know looks only matter for the bonding stages. After that, looks stop being important.

7. Smokes cigarettes.
I don't mind if she 420s. But cigs are a deal-breaker.

8. If the IQ difference is too big.
I'm not passing any judgments about people who have an average IQ.
But it limits the depths of conversations we could have.
It also limits how much of life's journey we would be sharing experientially.
If that IQ gap is too big, we could BE in the same places.

We could be DOING the same things. 

But we'd be living in two different "planes of existence".

We wouldn't really be "there" together;
not in the sense that matters. 

9. If our personal "views and values' are too divergent.
I don't need anyone to always agree with me.
But if they are too far to the Conservative-right, or too far to the Liberal-left,
it would be very ... disconnecting.
-Especially since both liberal-feminist and hyper-conservative trad-wifes only respect men who fit into their template for "how a man should be". To them, men are otherwise disposable.

Now, ironically, I (mostly) agree with the talking points of feminism. But at the same time, I recognize capital-F "Feminism" is a trauma response; the kind that makes women undatable. [See #4, on this list]

10. Has young children.
Don't get me wrong. I love kids. And I love the idea of experiencing raising kids with a psychologically healthy partner. So my HEART loves he idea of it. BUT ... my brain says "Don't do it", because if the relationship falls through for any reason, I'll be losing the kids too. I can't go through that again.

11. Has blunted positive emotions; no matter the cause.
If she is stuck in a reserved state for how she understands, feels, or expresses love, joy, fun, or romance, ... it would steal away my own joy over time.

I need a woman who will definitely want to spontaneously DANCE w/ me sometimes; even in public, who can LAUGH out loud, and who really appreciates romance as a waking "dream state" we share together.

I need someone who ... even if we're riding first class on a cruise, ... will still want to crash a loud Irish square-dancing party in 3rd class.

Later that night,
#que "Kiss me" from "Six Pence None The Richer", as we dance beneath fairy lights.

That brings me to ... #12.
"Tomboys".
Androgynous women.
 
Never again. 

However, don't get me wrong.
I want a STRONG woman.

Strong + Feminine = <3 

Example: a 40something version of her:

In fact, that was Mindy. 
But her Narcissistic Personality Disorder + AntiSocial Personality Disorder = made a relationship w/ her impossible. 

Although, there was also what I call "Survival Mode Androgyny".
It's when a woman would naturally be very feminine. But her being stuck in survival mode makes that impossible.
I just didn't understand this yet. 
Thus, I didn't realize I was partly to blame for that. 

But this is something "The Teal Swan" talks a lot about. 

I took a dozen years off of dating. 
But I WILL be dating again before this year ends. 
And I will NOT be making those same old mistakes.

It's time for all new mistakes.